Wasting time

What´s the point in doing this? Except for wasting time?? What a pointless existence!

Half full or half empty?

http://www.truthrealization.com/permalink/half-full.html

If you have glass half way filled with water would you see it as half full or half empty?



Hi Eddie,

just wanted to make a comment on this last post of yours. Every time I see that story, I smile because my answer is dependent on how thirsty I am. If I am in the desert, the glas is halfempty.
Monica

Neti and Nerves

Neti-Neti, a good thing they say. Does it work? I am not too sure about it. Since that dream about “the tall man taking my things away”, a lot of things has been unattached. I am still attached to nature though so I am not totally free.

BUT, now the question, how do I handle the body? How can I tell the body to act in accordance to the mind and soul?? Do I have to cut out my stomach?? Do surgery to cut those nerves?

There are things like my sister. She has a way of trying to make everone else to think her ways. I am just soo tired of it and we came to a confrontation when I had the last three “energyhits” in the beginning of June. I cut her off as she tried to make me do things I had no wish to do. I had my own problems to attend to.

I don´t care about her anymore. I am just tired of her ways. I have tried to heal our relation. The latest system is called EFT. Should be very good, but no changes in me as I can feel. I have tried to heal and release our relation. How do I conform the body with the mind?? I have tried healingsystems, reasonings, meditations. Nothing seem to do the trick. The body does not care to change.

My mind don´t bother anymore but my bodysystem JUST don´t want another confrontation.

My sister still tries to make me play with dolls.

Maya and enlightenment

I can´t see how one thing is "illusion" and another not. How can ANYTHING be more real or unreal then anything else. There is but ONE Universe and everything in it is REAL.

Don´t measure The Universe from limited senses.

Posted: Aug 2 2006, 07:58 AM by Aurora in Maya and Enlightenment, SDF


I am still working with this blog. There seem to be a pattern in there. But I am not finished yet. A little later I will take a step back and see what patterns there are. I think I am working throu both my human and spiritual lives. This blog and my home as I will move and am throwing away a lot of stuff.

In the bubble & teachers

For a few days now I had this feeling of being in a bubble. I have been here before. It is when you do everything as in a dream. I started to clean out the appartment for the moving in three months time. Then i “clean” out this spiritual mess, trying to get some structure to it. Then reading one of my granddaughters “Magic” books. And no matter what I do I am only half aware. The rest is elsewere.

When I look back I realise this is a period that sometimes comes after those violent and disturbing “hits”. (Se Dark Night) It is like a resting and recovering period. But there are also surges of energy going on. Like whe you loose balance and almost fall. And of course the hands and feet. There is a sound in my head, like background noice.


Been thinking a bit of spiritual teachers. Was looking at the homepage of one yesterday. It has changed remarkebly since the last time I visited. Earlier there was a lot of interresting stuff on that site, now only schedules and a book for sale. OK, they have to live, but it is sad.

I also have been thinking of the troubles I have and how teachers react to it. They don´t! They talk about a harsh path to Enlightenment but then, in their teachings they mostly tries to describe what can´t be described. But as I see it, a good teacher has to recognise the pitfalls and difficulties on every step of the way. For six long years noone could tell me anything about the “hits” of what I now know is either “raw energy” or the "tuch of the Divine". When I asked it was ignored mostly, or not recognised. So much suffering because nobody was able to tell me. What good is teachers if they can´t explain what I go through and guide me through it.

Visits

41 days with 303 visits (7.5 a day), and almost nobody comments? Exept for that Anonymous that wanted to advertice.

Don´t people need to know how rough the road might be? Do they think it is only light and love, and no sorrows?

Knot

Why does that knot in my stomach never go away? Makes me go crazy for no reason at all sometimes. If I could have one whish granted for myself, it would be to remove that knot. It takes a lot of energy to fight it or ignore it, and it does not even seem to be dependent on “fight or flight”. I am not nervous or scared, so why is it there?

Is ist a physical problem? I once heard it was a female problem. :-(

Moving

This morning I was throwing away a lot of things as I am going to move three months from now. Then I was at the lake this late afternoon. Took a quick swim and then sat down reading while drying. Earlier I had been picking some berries but they are dry as we had too little rain.

I had this feeling the whole day. I am working with this blog, and I started to go through my things before moving. I think the urge to move that I had for over a year now, is due to a feeling of “I´m done here”. For so many years this appartment and this forest and lake has seen my tears. Felt my struggles and tried to comfort me. Now it is growing in me that I need to start anew in order to be able to continue. Clean out all sorrows and pains. All stuff I didn´t even know I had weights me down. Both feelings and things. It will be a relief and I hope it cleanses out the path in front of me and let me travel easier.

The only thing here I am not done with is my daughter and my grandkids. But I will not move that far away. And there is MSN.

Thursday

Today I ordered a train ticket to visit my parents on Saturday. But……when I called them to say I´m coming my father told me that my sister already had decided to visit. As our relation is not the best for the moment I decided to wait till next week. It is strange, she refused to go there most of the time for different reasons. Always had a good excuse. Now after I told her I am never going to ask again, then she suddenly started to go there and now she is blocking me. Strange!

This made me think of those trainstation dreams. There are two of them. Think I have to post them.

Dark Night to Enlightenment

Spirit-soul, meditation-contemplation. The book of St John seem to confuse spirit-soul too. It talks rarely about meditation as it seem to think this is no time for medtiation as it does not work. It seems as he uses contemplation as a mean for the Divine to work with the spirit-soul. So far I have no understanding that the contemplating should be done by the human. I don´t understand the book compleately though. There are so many things that fits to my situation. But also some that I don´t recognice. For instance, I don´t have that religious background. I lack the memory of a “wonderful and loving God”. Maybe that was in an earlier lifetime. It seems as the soul can never be sure of if it is “finished”. He mention that often the soul think it is but some impurities still reamain and thus it starts all over again. This is actually the first one christian one I managed to read.

So, I finished it. The book ends at the 10th stage when the soul leaves the body. You are not done until your body is dead.

Later I found a letter from Eddie. Read it throu. It gives a slightly different view of Enlightenment. Guess that The Dark Night is a map of the road to Enlightenment, while Enlightenment is another way of describing the result. And how to live with it.

Eddies response to a SDF-post dated 050413 (LOVE, ILLUSION….)

If knowledge was enough, I would have been The Absolute long ago. But clearly there has to be that cleaning and you can´t do that by yourself. Just one thing, nowhere do we see the reason why it is so difficult to get there. If we come here to Earth, only to struggle all that much, to get back to where we came from?? Eddie gives an answer. “God loves experiences, all of them…” is that right? I remember I had that thought some years ago. The Universe is curious!

Blindfolded

The Dark Night of the Soul
Book Two, chapter 16 part
7. Oh, then, spiritual soul, when you see your appetites darkened, your inclinations dry and constrained, your faculties incapacitated for any interior exercise, do not be afflicted; think of this as a grace, since God is freeing you from yourself and taking from you your own activity. However well your actions may have succeeded, you did not work so completely, perfectly, and securely - because of their impurity and awkwardness - as you do now that God takes you by the hand and guides you in darkness, as though you were blind, along a way and to a place you know not. You would never have succeeded in reaching this place no matter how good your eyes and your feet.


See what I wrote in the “Guided to destiny” post 041126 on SDF.
Quote “Blindfolded I have to go in the direction given.”

I behind the eye

On MSN 060725
Aurora Borealis:
Am looking at your "I" picture
it´s me
JôJðMõJõ¿?
explain
Aurora Borealis:
two days ago I saw the first Hawk in front of my kayak this year. Sailing beautifully. Snakes is my totem. That is the Horus eye that is gurdian. Horus is Hawk. The Lady is coming back, I felt her this evening.

Thanks Jo for letting me post this,

SDF, Choise and Control

Posted: Jul 10 2006, 11:12 AM

shin,they say it is scriptured. They say it is the Dreamer that dreams it all.

The script and the Dreamer dreams me up and gives the plot. I am not the one making choices. The Dreamer are, or the script has already been written and is following it. From that point of view I have no choice or control whatsoever. I am just a puppet.

But the script allows for us to believe we have a choice. That does not make it one.

Change of paths is also in the script. And, we don´t have any choice wich path we are on. If I had a choice, I would not be here. But the Dreamer or the script don´t care.

I was involved in a discussion once, that we might be responsible for our thoughts. But, no......, there are only ONE.

quote shin: “This accepting responsibility is a tool to discover the real extent of our responsiblity in any given situation and not a device to aportion all blame to a victim.”

How can you discover the real extent of our responsibility by taking it all on you?? If you accept it all you don´t analyse it and can´t discover the real ...bla bla bla

To take “responsibility” for everything seem to me to be “to take the easy way out”.

I´m not in charge

That book confirms what I always known. I am not doing anything, it is done by other forces. I am just trying to figure out what the h-l is happening. I am not in charge of this journey.

More Dark.........

2006-07-23
Dark night, two kinds, sensory and spiritual.

If I understand what I have read so far, the ”hits” I have recieved could be explained as the Divine touching me. When my soul is weak and the light is bright it blindes me. Like when you look at the sun with pain and possible blindness as a result. It can be so strong it can actually kill somebody. Soooooo….. my reaction is not strange or overdone. Those things can happen.

I am not strong enough to handle it. And I am forced to do it anyway.
This book even explains the behaviour or certain people I have encountered. Even all those “teachers”. And I have not finished it yet. If I had knew about it earlier, my reactions would have been different in some cases.

Maybe that is why it suddenly worked with this moving. Maybe I need to get out of way of work and people. With a minimum of possessions. (I will throw away a lot) Maybe I will have an even rougher time. Well, I don´t dare speculate.

Well, I am grateful I found this book. At least now I know what it is all about. It will be easier to accept.

Dry and arid says the book about the dark nights. Applies to low waterlevel in the lake as well, it is dangerous I don´t know where the rocks are at this waterlevel. Sounds a little like the Dark Night, Don´t know the territory anymore.

What is your understanding on “contemplate”? As compared to meditation? Anyone who reads this?

The Empty Shell

Enlightened beings often speak of humans as ”empty shells”, indicating that the soul has distanced itself from the human body. The souls awareness it toward the Absolute and does not recognice the body in the same way as before. Thus, the body seem “hollow” and unfamiliar.

It is also common to say the body “goes on it´s business on autopilot”. The awareness of the soul is directed upwords but the body-spirit works normally anyway.

So, my two cents is that the soul has to expand it´s awareness to go in all directions. Be equally aware of all dimensions. It is not finished until then. And then, when the system is comlete, it should be able to work in yet unknown ways.

This, again, raises the question “does the human really need the soul?”.

This mornings speculation.

I have thunderclouds to the south, I have blue skies to the north. And a bird shining like silver towards the dark clouds. What is the weatherforecast for this day?

(In my world the terminology is: human-spirit-soul-Absolute)

Dark Night of The Soul, e-books

Dark Night of The Soul,
St John of the Cross

I found e-books for free at some locations. Different translations. So if you want them, take a look at the language used before download.

http://www.ccel.org/ccel/john_cross/dark_night.html

http://www.karmel.at/ics/john/dn.html

I downloaded one. Wonder if I will read it. I am not that good at religion stuff. The last one seem to be easier to read but harder to get. ;-)

What am I?

What are we??

Creation on SDF. chip:
“Question...what substance did god use to create?”

I said “Itself”

“Would any of you agree there is a difference between the term 'created' and 'emanated'?”

I said: Hi chip
looking into the dictionary for the translation of emanate. I am not sure I like either emanate or creation. Creation means it takes some matter and create things outside of itself. Emanate seem to mean something that is made in “headquarters” and then leave it. As I see it, it is more like manifesting possibilities, it´s a quality of the Absolute. (like a shapeshifter )

Well, then, what am I?

I seem to be an individual, apart from anyone else. But if I look closer, and also believe what science tells me, this is not so. I am not apart from my surroundings. Yes, I am walking around on my two legs. But I am connected to everything else through air, water, energy, thoughts. This body can´t live without everything else. I breath what plants has created. Well, woun´t spill time on what´s obvious.

I can sense people from around the world. I can feel them. I sence the mood of the person next to me. I sense their energyfield too. The fields stretches around the planet and is interacting. I am made of stuff that´s been in a star. Science says every particle has connentions with every other particle and knows where it is. Quantum physics also talkes about the field of possibilities.

The fact that I seem to walk about on my own is an illusion due to the fact that my eyes can´t see what is really going on. The denser matter is still connected with the thinner material. Radiation, subparticles, strings and whatever science will find in the future. It just seems as I am apart from denser substances of view. It is at all times fully interacting with the “spiders web”.

I have seen the world go transparent, I have felt fragrance coming from flowers on the TV-set. I know I am not apart from anything else. I have held my dead grandsons spirit in my arms (after the funeral, not the body). I have sensed a greater mind than mine.

“Creation” need that illusion, that limited awareness, or it would not be “creation”.

But this does not mean My mind has transformed. But I have some experiences, for what it is worth.

Edited 060719

Is life...?

Is life holy and wonderful

or just an empty shell with no purpose


Two posts by JoJoMoJo and Infinite Rose in the SDF made me wonder.
http://spiritual-forum.net/iboard/index.php?act=ST&f=24&t=3539&s=15e9eed46b6bc6c54f78a5038f0dea6d

Like the colors........

Like the colors all comes from the white light,

maybe all feelings comes from stillness.

all different substance from energy (or strings or what it will be when they learn more)

and all above, from Awareness, The One



The idéa from an early writing of mine.