2006-05-21

For the Absolute

if some things is not changing soon I will rob you of this tool that goes under the name Monica. I am damned pissed of being forced to deal with things that I consider shit. I am doing what I can to live a calm and peaceful life, and you constantly throw this shit in my face. I don´t care about this shit, and I have no whish whatsoever to deal with it. And yet you throw it all at me. I have already made two suicide attempts. I will not let you “save” me the third time. And, thus, I will not become your tool.


I will not post the rest. I had a converstion with my friend. She has been a great support to me. What she did not know in this situation was that I almost tipped over the edge again. I went to the store and bought myself a sharp, stiletto shaped knife. If necessary I would have used it. And it was close. But she helped me deal with it. I know I scared her. Forgive me.