The working issue

We talked about the working issue the other day.

Of course I know that it is not the work that is the problem here. The wish for silence and solitude is not a “wish”, it is an urge. Not consiously coming from me. It is deeper than that.

Using ”I” in an normal way here.
I don´t dislike my job. It is a good job and isn´t even boring. It is just that my mind is off to other places. Disturbed by having to think of “unimportant” things like engines and computer problems. And that I have no saying in this matter. If boss says “working”, I have to work. And this week it really have been thumb down. The work for clients was finished. But my boss kept me at the office anyway. Having me working with his dream-engines. Work that NEVER will come to production. I felt like I am sitting in a kindergarten for adult males. It would have been more useful being home packing and cleaning. My back is starting to ache and need to slow down.

I am also tired of men never get their woek done. I have been waiting 6 weeks to receive the project I was supposed to do. Still have not seen it. Then, if it comes, I will have to travel a lot and the work probably should be finished last week. L After 45 yrs I am tired of it. But can do nothing.

So, what is the problem then? Sure, it is inside of me. Work itself is not a problem. It is the way I feel about it. I try to ignore it or switch to “watcher”, has actually done that on and off for some time. Not really being aware of doing it. But still think I could do without this kind of job.

Growing potatoes and carrots would be much more satiesfying. Letting my mind go about it´s own business.