41 days with 303 visits (7.5 a day), and almost nobody comments? Exept for that Anonymous that wanted to advertice.
Don´t people need to know how rough the road might be? Do they think it is only light and love, and no sorrows?
2006-07-31
2006-07-30
Knot
Why does that knot in my stomach never go away? Makes me go crazy for no reason at all sometimes. If I could have one whish granted for myself, it would be to remove that knot. It takes a lot of energy to fight it or ignore it, and it does not even seem to be dependent on “fight or flight”. I am not nervous or scared, so why is it there?
Is ist a physical problem? I once heard it was a female problem. :-(
Is ist a physical problem? I once heard it was a female problem. :-(
2006-07-28
Moving
This morning I was throwing away a lot of things as I am going to move three months from now. Then I was at the lake this late afternoon. Took a quick swim and then sat down reading while drying. Earlier I had been picking some berries but they are dry as we had too little rain.
I had this feeling the whole day. I am working with this blog, and I started to go through my things before moving. I think the urge to move that I had for over a year now, is due to a feeling of “I´m done here”. For so many years this appartment and this forest and lake has seen my tears. Felt my struggles and tried to comfort me. Now it is growing in me that I need to start anew in order to be able to continue. Clean out all sorrows and pains. All stuff I didn´t even know I had weights me down. Both feelings and things. It will be a relief and I hope it cleanses out the path in front of me and let me travel easier.
The only thing here I am not done with is my daughter and my grandkids. But I will not move that far away. And there is MSN.
I had this feeling the whole day. I am working with this blog, and I started to go through my things before moving. I think the urge to move that I had for over a year now, is due to a feeling of “I´m done here”. For so many years this appartment and this forest and lake has seen my tears. Felt my struggles and tried to comfort me. Now it is growing in me that I need to start anew in order to be able to continue. Clean out all sorrows and pains. All stuff I didn´t even know I had weights me down. Both feelings and things. It will be a relief and I hope it cleanses out the path in front of me and let me travel easier.
The only thing here I am not done with is my daughter and my grandkids. But I will not move that far away. And there is MSN.
2006-07-27
Thursday
Today I ordered a train ticket to visit my parents on Saturday. But……when I called them to say I´m coming my father told me that my sister already had decided to visit. As our relation is not the best for the moment I decided to wait till next week. It is strange, she refused to go there most of the time for different reasons. Always had a good excuse. Now after I told her I am never going to ask again, then she suddenly started to go there and now she is blocking me. Strange!
This made me think of those trainstation dreams. There are two of them. Think I have to post them.
This made me think of those trainstation dreams. There are two of them. Think I have to post them.
2006-07-25
Dark Night to Enlightenment
Spirit-soul, meditation-contemplation. The book of St John seem to confuse spirit-soul too. It talks rarely about meditation as it seem to think this is no time for medtiation as it does not work. It seems as he uses contemplation as a mean for the Divine to work with the spirit-soul. So far I have no understanding that the contemplating should be done by the human. I don´t understand the book compleately though. There are so many things that fits to my situation. But also some that I don´t recognice. For instance, I don´t have that religious background. I lack the memory of a “wonderful and loving God”. Maybe that was in an earlier lifetime. It seems as the soul can never be sure of if it is “finished”. He mention that often the soul think it is but some impurities still reamain and thus it starts all over again. This is actually the first one christian one I managed to read.
So, I finished it. The book ends at the 10th stage when the soul leaves the body. You are not done until your body is dead.
Later I found a letter from Eddie. Read it throu. It gives a slightly different view of Enlightenment. Guess that The Dark Night is a map of the road to Enlightenment, while Enlightenment is another way of describing the result. And how to live with it.
Eddies response to a SDF-post dated 050413 (LOVE, ILLUSION….)
If knowledge was enough, I would have been The Absolute long ago. But clearly there has to be that cleaning and you can´t do that by yourself. Just one thing, nowhere do we see the reason why it is so difficult to get there. If we come here to Earth, only to struggle all that much, to get back to where we came from?? Eddie gives an answer. “God loves experiences, all of them…” is that right? I remember I had that thought some years ago. The Universe is curious!
So, I finished it. The book ends at the 10th stage when the soul leaves the body. You are not done until your body is dead.
Later I found a letter from Eddie. Read it throu. It gives a slightly different view of Enlightenment. Guess that The Dark Night is a map of the road to Enlightenment, while Enlightenment is another way of describing the result. And how to live with it.
Eddies response to a SDF-post dated 050413 (LOVE, ILLUSION….)
If knowledge was enough, I would have been The Absolute long ago. But clearly there has to be that cleaning and you can´t do that by yourself. Just one thing, nowhere do we see the reason why it is so difficult to get there. If we come here to Earth, only to struggle all that much, to get back to where we came from?? Eddie gives an answer. “God loves experiences, all of them…” is that right? I remember I had that thought some years ago. The Universe is curious!
Blindfolded
The Dark Night of the Soul
Book Two, chapter 16 part
7. Oh, then, spiritual soul, when you see your appetites darkened, your inclinations dry and constrained, your faculties incapacitated for any interior exercise, do not be afflicted; think of this as a grace, since God is freeing you from yourself and taking from you your own activity. However well your actions may have succeeded, you did not work so completely, perfectly, and securely - because of their impurity and awkwardness - as you do now that God takes you by the hand and guides you in darkness, as though you were blind, along a way and to a place you know not. You would never have succeeded in reaching this place no matter how good your eyes and your feet.
See what I wrote in the “Guided to destiny” post 041126 on SDF.
Quote “Blindfolded I have to go in the direction given.”
Book Two, chapter 16 part
7. Oh, then, spiritual soul, when you see your appetites darkened, your inclinations dry and constrained, your faculties incapacitated for any interior exercise, do not be afflicted; think of this as a grace, since God is freeing you from yourself and taking from you your own activity. However well your actions may have succeeded, you did not work so completely, perfectly, and securely - because of their impurity and awkwardness - as you do now that God takes you by the hand and guides you in darkness, as though you were blind, along a way and to a place you know not. You would never have succeeded in reaching this place no matter how good your eyes and your feet.
See what I wrote in the “Guided to destiny” post 041126 on SDF.
Quote “Blindfolded I have to go in the direction given.”
I behind the eye
On MSN 060725Aurora Borealis:
Am looking at your "I" picture
it´s me
JôJðMõJõ¿?
explain
Aurora Borealis:
two days ago I saw the first Hawk in front of my kayak this year. Sailing beautifully. Snakes is my totem. That is the Horus eye that is gurdian. Horus is Hawk. The Lady is coming back, I felt her this evening.
Thanks Jo for letting me post this,
2006-07-24
SDF, Choise and Control
Posted: Jul 10 2006, 11:12 AM
shin,they say it is scriptured. They say it is the Dreamer that dreams it all.
The script and the Dreamer dreams me up and gives the plot. I am not the one making choices. The Dreamer are, or the script has already been written and is following it. From that point of view I have no choice or control whatsoever. I am just a puppet.
But the script allows for us to believe we have a choice. That does not make it one.
Change of paths is also in the script. And, we don´t have any choice wich path we are on. If I had a choice, I would not be here. But the Dreamer or the script don´t care.
I was involved in a discussion once, that we might be responsible for our thoughts. But, no......, there are only ONE.
quote shin: “This accepting responsibility is a tool to discover the real extent of our responsiblity in any given situation and not a device to aportion all blame to a victim.”
How can you discover the real extent of our responsibility by taking it all on you?? If you accept it all you don´t analyse it and can´t discover the real ...bla bla bla
To take “responsibility” for everything seem to me to be “to take the easy way out”.
shin,they say it is scriptured. They say it is the Dreamer that dreams it all.
The script and the Dreamer dreams me up and gives the plot. I am not the one making choices. The Dreamer are, or the script has already been written and is following it. From that point of view I have no choice or control whatsoever. I am just a puppet.
But the script allows for us to believe we have a choice. That does not make it one.
Change of paths is also in the script. And, we don´t have any choice wich path we are on. If I had a choice, I would not be here. But the Dreamer or the script don´t care.
I was involved in a discussion once, that we might be responsible for our thoughts. But, no......, there are only ONE.
quote shin: “This accepting responsibility is a tool to discover the real extent of our responsiblity in any given situation and not a device to aportion all blame to a victim.”
How can you discover the real extent of our responsibility by taking it all on you?? If you accept it all you don´t analyse it and can´t discover the real ...bla bla bla
To take “responsibility” for everything seem to me to be “to take the easy way out”.
2006-07-23
I´m not in charge
That book confirms what I always known. I am not doing anything, it is done by other forces. I am just trying to figure out what the h-l is happening. I am not in charge of this journey.
More Dark.........
2006-07-23
Dark night, two kinds, sensory and spiritual.
If I understand what I have read so far, the ”hits” I have recieved could be explained as the Divine touching me. When my soul is weak and the light is bright it blindes me. Like when you look at the sun with pain and possible blindness as a result. It can be so strong it can actually kill somebody. Soooooo….. my reaction is not strange or overdone. Those things can happen.
I am not strong enough to handle it. And I am forced to do it anyway.
This book even explains the behaviour or certain people I have encountered. Even all those “teachers”. And I have not finished it yet. If I had knew about it earlier, my reactions would have been different in some cases.
Maybe that is why it suddenly worked with this moving. Maybe I need to get out of way of work and people. With a minimum of possessions. (I will throw away a lot) Maybe I will have an even rougher time. Well, I don´t dare speculate.
Well, I am grateful I found this book. At least now I know what it is all about. It will be easier to accept.
Dry and arid says the book about the dark nights. Applies to low waterlevel in the lake as well, it is dangerous I don´t know where the rocks are at this waterlevel. Sounds a little like the Dark Night, Don´t know the territory anymore.
What is your understanding on “contemplate”? As compared to meditation? Anyone who reads this?
Dark night, two kinds, sensory and spiritual.
If I understand what I have read so far, the ”hits” I have recieved could be explained as the Divine touching me. When my soul is weak and the light is bright it blindes me. Like when you look at the sun with pain and possible blindness as a result. It can be so strong it can actually kill somebody. Soooooo….. my reaction is not strange or overdone. Those things can happen.
I am not strong enough to handle it. And I am forced to do it anyway.
This book even explains the behaviour or certain people I have encountered. Even all those “teachers”. And I have not finished it yet. If I had knew about it earlier, my reactions would have been different in some cases.
Maybe that is why it suddenly worked with this moving. Maybe I need to get out of way of work and people. With a minimum of possessions. (I will throw away a lot) Maybe I will have an even rougher time. Well, I don´t dare speculate.
Well, I am grateful I found this book. At least now I know what it is all about. It will be easier to accept.
Dry and arid says the book about the dark nights. Applies to low waterlevel in the lake as well, it is dangerous I don´t know where the rocks are at this waterlevel. Sounds a little like the Dark Night, Don´t know the territory anymore.
What is your understanding on “contemplate”? As compared to meditation? Anyone who reads this?
2006-07-21
The Empty Shell
Enlightened beings often speak of humans as ”empty shells”, indicating that the soul has distanced itself from the human body. The souls awareness it toward the Absolute and does not recognice the body in the same way as before. Thus, the body seem “hollow” and unfamiliar.
It is also common to say the body “goes on it´s business on autopilot”. The awareness of the soul is directed upwords but the body-spirit works normally anyway.
So, my two cents is that the soul has to expand it´s awareness to go in all directions. Be equally aware of all dimensions. It is not finished until then. And then, when the system is comlete, it should be able to work in yet unknown ways.
This, again, raises the question “does the human really need the soul?”.
This mornings speculation.
I have thunderclouds to the south, I have blue skies to the north. And a bird shining like silver towards the dark clouds. What is the weatherforecast for this day?
(In my world the terminology is: human-spirit-soul-Absolute)
It is also common to say the body “goes on it´s business on autopilot”. The awareness of the soul is directed upwords but the body-spirit works normally anyway.
So, my two cents is that the soul has to expand it´s awareness to go in all directions. Be equally aware of all dimensions. It is not finished until then. And then, when the system is comlete, it should be able to work in yet unknown ways.
This, again, raises the question “does the human really need the soul?”.
This mornings speculation.
I have thunderclouds to the south, I have blue skies to the north. And a bird shining like silver towards the dark clouds. What is the weatherforecast for this day?
(In my world the terminology is: human-spirit-soul-Absolute)
2006-07-20
Dark Night of The Soul, e-books
Dark Night of The Soul,
St John of the Cross
I found e-books for free at some locations. Different translations. So if you want them, take a look at the language used before download.
http://www.ccel.org/ccel/john_cross/dark_night.html
http://www.karmel.at/ics/john/dn.html
I downloaded one. Wonder if I will read it. I am not that good at religion stuff. The last one seem to be easier to read but harder to get. ;-)
St John of the Cross
I found e-books for free at some locations. Different translations. So if you want them, take a look at the language used before download.
http://www.ccel.org/ccel/john_cross/dark_night.html
http://www.karmel.at/ics/john/dn.html
I downloaded one. Wonder if I will read it. I am not that good at religion stuff. The last one seem to be easier to read but harder to get. ;-)
2006-07-19
What am I?
What are we??
Creation on SDF. chip:
“Question...what substance did god use to create?”
I said “Itself”
“Would any of you agree there is a difference between the term 'created' and 'emanated'?”
I said: Hi chip
looking into the dictionary for the translation of emanate. I am not sure I like either emanate or creation. Creation means it takes some matter and create things outside of itself. Emanate seem to mean something that is made in “headquarters” and then leave it. As I see it, it is more like manifesting possibilities, it´s a quality of the Absolute. (like a shapeshifter )
Well, then, what am I?
I seem to be an individual, apart from anyone else. But if I look closer, and also believe what science tells me, this is not so. I am not apart from my surroundings. Yes, I am walking around on my two legs. But I am connected to everything else through air, water, energy, thoughts. This body can´t live without everything else. I breath what plants has created. Well, woun´t spill time on what´s obvious.
I can sense people from around the world. I can feel them. I sence the mood of the person next to me. I sense their energyfield too. The fields stretches around the planet and is interacting. I am made of stuff that´s been in a star. Science says every particle has connentions with every other particle and knows where it is. Quantum physics also talkes about the field of possibilities.
The fact that I seem to walk about on my own is an illusion due to the fact that my eyes can´t see what is really going on. The denser matter is still connected with the thinner material. Radiation, subparticles, strings and whatever science will find in the future. It just seems as I am apart from denser substances of view. It is at all times fully interacting with the “spiders web”.
I have seen the world go transparent, I have felt fragrance coming from flowers on the TV-set. I know I am not apart from anything else. I have held my dead grandsons spirit in my arms (after the funeral, not the body). I have sensed a greater mind than mine.
“Creation” need that illusion, that limited awareness, or it would not be “creation”.
But this does not mean My mind has transformed. But I have some experiences, for what it is worth.
Edited 060719
Creation on SDF. chip:
“Question...what substance did god use to create?”
I said “Itself”
“Would any of you agree there is a difference between the term 'created' and 'emanated'?”
I said: Hi chip
looking into the dictionary for the translation of emanate. I am not sure I like either emanate or creation. Creation means it takes some matter and create things outside of itself. Emanate seem to mean something that is made in “headquarters” and then leave it. As I see it, it is more like manifesting possibilities, it´s a quality of the Absolute. (like a shapeshifter )
Well, then, what am I?
I seem to be an individual, apart from anyone else. But if I look closer, and also believe what science tells me, this is not so. I am not apart from my surroundings. Yes, I am walking around on my two legs. But I am connected to everything else through air, water, energy, thoughts. This body can´t live without everything else. I breath what plants has created. Well, woun´t spill time on what´s obvious.
I can sense people from around the world. I can feel them. I sence the mood of the person next to me. I sense their energyfield too. The fields stretches around the planet and is interacting. I am made of stuff that´s been in a star. Science says every particle has connentions with every other particle and knows where it is. Quantum physics also talkes about the field of possibilities.
The fact that I seem to walk about on my own is an illusion due to the fact that my eyes can´t see what is really going on. The denser matter is still connected with the thinner material. Radiation, subparticles, strings and whatever science will find in the future. It just seems as I am apart from denser substances of view. It is at all times fully interacting with the “spiders web”.
I have seen the world go transparent, I have felt fragrance coming from flowers on the TV-set. I know I am not apart from anything else. I have held my dead grandsons spirit in my arms (after the funeral, not the body). I have sensed a greater mind than mine.
“Creation” need that illusion, that limited awareness, or it would not be “creation”.
But this does not mean My mind has transformed. But I have some experiences, for what it is worth.
Edited 060719
2006-07-18
Is life...?
Is life holy and wonderful
or just an empty shell with no purpose
Two posts by JoJoMoJo and Infinite Rose in the SDF made me wonder.
http://spiritual-forum.net/iboard/index.php?act=ST&f=24&t=3539&s=15e9eed46b6bc6c54f78a5038f0dea6d
2006-07-17
Like the colors........
Like the colors all comes from the white light,
maybe all feelings comes from stillness.
all different substance from energy (or strings or what it will be when they learn more)
and all above, from Awareness, The One
The idéa from an early writing of mine.
maybe all feelings comes from stillness.
all different substance from energy (or strings or what it will be when they learn more)
and all above, from Awareness, The One
The idéa from an early writing of mine.
2006-07-11
R Maharshi_brainsplit
This is the first time I seen it mentioned apart from my own experience. The brainsplit! Though mine did not have the fancy lightings. Mine was only the two hands grabbing the brain and split it. (See “How it started "Am I tricked" 2000-03-12”) And mine was not healed.
Eyes of the Maharshi
By N. R. KRISHNAMURTI AIYER
Quote from the article:
“As it went on, I began to witness certain changes in my body taking place. I saw a pair of serpents rising from the base of my spine in a crisscross, spiralling manner. They rose to the crown of my head and spread their hoods. One was red; the other blue. The whole cranium became suffused with a bright light. My attention was fixed upon the point between my eyebrows where the serpents’ heads were pointed.
All of a sudden there was a splitting of the skull from the top front to the back. This was followed by an upward gush of a reddish flame shooting out from the top of my head. While this was flowing out, a stream of nectar issued from the single breast of the Ardhanareswara form of the Maharshi and a second stream of nectar flowed out from the top of Arunachala. Both streams landed on my head and sealed the break in my skull.
When the skull was sealed I experienced a brilliant light, like that of an arc lamp, and an indescribable joy and coolness filled my being. This light and joy continued for several hours.”
http://www.realization.org/page/doc1/doc109b.htm
Eyes of the Maharshi
By N. R. KRISHNAMURTI AIYER
Quote from the article:
“As it went on, I began to witness certain changes in my body taking place. I saw a pair of serpents rising from the base of my spine in a crisscross, spiralling manner. They rose to the crown of my head and spread their hoods. One was red; the other blue. The whole cranium became suffused with a bright light. My attention was fixed upon the point between my eyebrows where the serpents’ heads were pointed.
All of a sudden there was a splitting of the skull from the top front to the back. This was followed by an upward gush of a reddish flame shooting out from the top of my head. While this was flowing out, a stream of nectar issued from the single breast of the Ardhanareswara form of the Maharshi and a second stream of nectar flowed out from the top of Arunachala. Both streams landed on my head and sealed the break in my skull.
When the skull was sealed I experienced a brilliant light, like that of an arc lamp, and an indescribable joy and coolness filled my being. This light and joy continued for several hours.”
http://www.realization.org/page/doc1/doc109b.htm
Snakes and moving
I am going to my parents town tomorrow to look for an appartment. I was happy about it but……..
This last encounter with the snake made me wonder. If I move I have to leave them. Are they important to me? Answer YES. Guardians are supposed to give messages, how do I find out what it is?
Their forest is cut down, piece by piece. Maybe there are no forest in a couple of years.
Never thought this would be a problem. :-(
This last encounter with the snake made me wonder. If I move I have to leave them. Are they important to me? Answer YES. Guardians are supposed to give messages, how do I find out what it is?
Their forest is cut down, piece by piece. Maybe there are no forest in a couple of years.
Never thought this would be a problem. :-(
2006-07-09
Close encounter
Was telling somebody about my “guardian snakes” earlier today. I use them as guardians when I meditate. They occur a lot in my life. I will tell more about them later. This happened today. The swedish name of that snake is Snok.
Had another “close encounter” with the snake. Same speices as before. I was sitting at the rock by the lake. The same place as last time. I was reading, using my backpack to lean on. When I looked up I saw it beside my shoes. Heading towards my butt. I had the legs a bit above ground. I was still. When it reached my butt it moved beside it below my legs. Touching me. It followed my body up at the side. Went under my left arm and continued up beside the backpack. As I only had a bikini on I could feel it the whole time on my skin. When I did not feel it any more then I leaned over to see where it was heading. About a meter away it stoped and looked back on me. Then headed for the trees.
It was a nice soft feeling when it moved beside me. Touching me.
2006-07-08
Contradictions of the Absolute
Last eddied: 060708
Last week I got some old questions answered. Maybe it is “counting down” now.
Here is some remaining issues of or about the Absolute. I will quote things I have heard or seen written about the Absolute. I might ad things in this post as I come across or remember things. I just write it down as it comes. No particular order.
The Absolute is, or is said to:
1 Nothing and NO THINGS
2 Everything and ALL THINGS
3 Consiousness
4 Awareness
5 Creation / Maya
6 But creation and Maya don´t exist
7 Is still, no movements
8 The Dreamer
9 I AM
10 Everyting is scriptured
11 No free will, see scriptured
12 Has no interest in you
13 Need you to come back to source
14 Has no needs or wants
15 Has your best interests in mind
16 does not bother with your problems
17 You have to go through “hell” to get there (there?)
18 It does not DO anything BAD to you (yet it dreams my life)
19 If anything GOOD is happening then The Absolute is responsible
20 The creation / Maya is ILLUSION
21 ILLUSIONS don´t exist
22 You have to want IT
23 It “kicks your ass” to clean you so you shall become worthy
24 You as human, don´t get enlightened, maybe the soul does
25 You are already THAT
26 Kill the Ego
27 The ego can´t be killed totally, it is needed to “run” the bodyfunctions
According to science and physics there are actually only energy of some sort. So a lot is not contradictions even if it seems to be.
The Dreamer, that is the Absolute, dreams this dream. It dreams everything that happens to you, but is still not responsible for what happens to you. Does not the Absolute know what it dreams?
I certainly know I am not this body that is typing and thinking. Most people seem to advance through scriptures and religion. I seek answer elswere, because I seek answers to what happens to ME. Mostly I just hate it.
You have no free will, yet you are blaimed for “not wanting this badly enough”.
Why is it that you have to be beaten to be cleaned? Is not love a better way to “raise a spiritual child”? I have been very close to hate a vast no of times.
Why do we have to suffer for past life karma? To be blamed for “wanting to change the deal” when you know nothing about it, just pisses one of.
Seems to be a lot. Will probably need a couple of more lives. But then you have to start it all over again and again and again. What´s the point in doing that? The Absolut is curious and wants to experience it all. That is my take on it. No other meaning.
The body wears out in a life-time. Maybe it takes several life-times to wear out the soul before it “dies” and gets into the Absolute.
Enlightened people say they are THAT, but never claims to speak the word of the Absolute. How can they BE the Absolute without speaking the words of it?
Does the human need the “soul”?
Last week I got some old questions answered. Maybe it is “counting down” now.
Here is some remaining issues of or about the Absolute. I will quote things I have heard or seen written about the Absolute. I might ad things in this post as I come across or remember things. I just write it down as it comes. No particular order.
The Absolute is, or is said to:
1 Nothing and NO THINGS
2 Everything and ALL THINGS
3 Consiousness
4 Awareness
5 Creation / Maya
6 But creation and Maya don´t exist
7 Is still, no movements
8 The Dreamer
9 I AM
10 Everyting is scriptured
11 No free will, see scriptured
12 Has no interest in you
13 Need you to come back to source
14 Has no needs or wants
15 Has your best interests in mind
16 does not bother with your problems
17 You have to go through “hell” to get there (there?)
18 It does not DO anything BAD to you (yet it dreams my life)
19 If anything GOOD is happening then The Absolute is responsible
20 The creation / Maya is ILLUSION
21 ILLUSIONS don´t exist
22 You have to want IT
23 It “kicks your ass” to clean you so you shall become worthy
24 You as human, don´t get enlightened, maybe the soul does
25 You are already THAT
26 Kill the Ego
27 The ego can´t be killed totally, it is needed to “run” the bodyfunctions
According to science and physics there are actually only energy of some sort. So a lot is not contradictions even if it seems to be.
The Dreamer, that is the Absolute, dreams this dream. It dreams everything that happens to you, but is still not responsible for what happens to you. Does not the Absolute know what it dreams?
I certainly know I am not this body that is typing and thinking. Most people seem to advance through scriptures and religion. I seek answer elswere, because I seek answers to what happens to ME. Mostly I just hate it.
You have no free will, yet you are blaimed for “not wanting this badly enough”.
Why is it that you have to be beaten to be cleaned? Is not love a better way to “raise a spiritual child”? I have been very close to hate a vast no of times.
Why do we have to suffer for past life karma? To be blamed for “wanting to change the deal” when you know nothing about it, just pisses one of.
Seems to be a lot. Will probably need a couple of more lives. But then you have to start it all over again and again and again. What´s the point in doing that? The Absolut is curious and wants to experience it all. That is my take on it. No other meaning.
The body wears out in a life-time. Maybe it takes several life-times to wear out the soul before it “dies” and gets into the Absolute.
Enlightened people say they are THAT, but never claims to speak the word of the Absolute. How can they BE the Absolute without speaking the words of it?
Does the human need the “soul”?
2006-07-06
So many things.......
....has been said so many times. I know them in my head and my heart, yet I am not done. Will I ever be? I heard the same things said and written by science, physics, mystics. I understand them, I know them yet………….
…….. this dragonfly never get wings.
…….. this dragonfly never get wings.
2006-07-05
If the map
Is scriptures more important then what happens to you? Are your experiences not real if you can´t find it in old books? Should you ignore your own experiences and trust what others experienced centuries ago?
If the map and nature does not match, should you trust the map??
If the map and nature does not match, should you trust the map??
2006-07-04
Dark Night, St John of the Cross
I was looking for more info yesterday. Made a search for "Dark Night .."+forums. On several places this appeard. It seem to explain even what I call "hits" or blows" they call it "bursts of raw energy that from time to time may course through your being." That energy that throws you headfirst into a wall and makes you crawl like a worm on a hook. It also explain why it comes back again and again. There is not one and then you are finished. It also explain why nobody seem to be able to help. I have been frustrated because I have had people doing a lot to help. With no result. I felt like a jerk because I was not able to follow advice. Well, anyway, now I know what happens to me is not uncommon. Even the "hits" is explained. What is left now is how many more will there be?? With all that I have had, I must certainly be very clean in the end. Just hope that the process of cleaning don´t kill the patient. I wish I had seen this 6 years ago, would have spared me a lot of dispair and mistrust. ;.)
http://crypt.eldritchs.com/wicca/darknight.html
Dark Night Of The Soul
"The Dark Night of the Soul" is the name given to that experience of spiritual desolation that all students of the Occult pass through at one time or another. It is sometimes characterized by feelings that your occult studies or practices are not taken you anywhere, that the initial success that one is sometimes granted after a few months of occult working, has suddenly dried up. There comes a desire to give up on everything, to abandon exercises and meditation, as nothing seems to be working.
St.John of the Cross. a christian mystic, said of this experience, that it;"...puts the sensory spiritual appetites to sleep, deadens them, and deprives them of the ability to find pleasure in anything. It binds the imagination, and impedes it from doing any good discursive work. It makes the memory cease, the intellect become dark and unable to understand anything, and hence it causes the will to become arid and constrained, and all the faculties empty and useless. And over this hangs a dense and burdensome cloud, which afflicts the soul, and keeps it withdrawn from the good."
Though the beginner may view the onset of such an experience with alarm (I know I did), the "Dark Night" is not something bad or destructive. In one sense it may be seen as a trial, a test by which the Gods examine our resolve to continue with occult work, and if you are not completely whole-hearted about your magical studies, it is during this period (at its beginning) that you will give up. The Dark Night of the Soul should be welcomed, once recognized for what it is (I have always received an innate "warning" just before the onset of such a period), as a person might welcome an operation that will secure health and well-being. St.John of the Cross embraced the soul`s Dark Night as a Divine Appointment, calling it a period of "sheer grace" and adding;"O guiding Night,O Night more lovely than Dawn,O Night that has united the lover with his beloved Transforming the Lover in her Beloved."
When entering the Dark Night one is overcome by a sense of spiritual dryness and depression. The notion, in some quarters, that all such experiences should be avoided, for a peaceful existence, shows up the superficiality of so much of contemporary living. The Dark Night is a way of bringing the Soul to stillness, so that deep psychic transformation may take place. All distractions must be set aside, and it is no good attempting to fight or channel the bursts of raw energy that from time to time may course through your being. This inner compulsion to set everything aside results in the outer depression, when nothing seems to excite.
The only thing to do is obey your inner voice and become still, waiting for the inner transformation, (which the "Dark Night" heralds), to take place. You may not be aware for a very long time of the results of that inner change, but when the desire to work comes again and the depression lifts, the Dark Night has (for a moment) passed. No one can help during this time, and in many cases there is hardly anyone to turn for advice. One must disregard the well-meaning advice of family and friends to "snap out of it" this is no ordinary depression, but a deep spiritual experience which only those who have passed through themselves (in other words to a magical retreat) but for many, as the routines of everyday life prohibits this, all you can do is cultivate an inner solitude, a stillness and silence of heart, and wait, (like a chrysalis waits for the inner changes that will result in a butterfly) for the Transformation to work itself out. There are many such "Dark Nights" that the occult seeker must pass through during the mysterious process of mitigation. They are all trials but experience teaches one to cope more efficiently.
http://crypt.eldritchs.com/wicca/darknight.html
Dark Night Of The Soul
"The Dark Night of the Soul" is the name given to that experience of spiritual desolation that all students of the Occult pass through at one time or another. It is sometimes characterized by feelings that your occult studies or practices are not taken you anywhere, that the initial success that one is sometimes granted after a few months of occult working, has suddenly dried up. There comes a desire to give up on everything, to abandon exercises and meditation, as nothing seems to be working.
St.John of the Cross. a christian mystic, said of this experience, that it;"...puts the sensory spiritual appetites to sleep, deadens them, and deprives them of the ability to find pleasure in anything. It binds the imagination, and impedes it from doing any good discursive work. It makes the memory cease, the intellect become dark and unable to understand anything, and hence it causes the will to become arid and constrained, and all the faculties empty and useless. And over this hangs a dense and burdensome cloud, which afflicts the soul, and keeps it withdrawn from the good."
Though the beginner may view the onset of such an experience with alarm (I know I did), the "Dark Night" is not something bad or destructive. In one sense it may be seen as a trial, a test by which the Gods examine our resolve to continue with occult work, and if you are not completely whole-hearted about your magical studies, it is during this period (at its beginning) that you will give up. The Dark Night of the Soul should be welcomed, once recognized for what it is (I have always received an innate "warning" just before the onset of such a period), as a person might welcome an operation that will secure health and well-being. St.John of the Cross embraced the soul`s Dark Night as a Divine Appointment, calling it a period of "sheer grace" and adding;"O guiding Night,O Night more lovely than Dawn,O Night that has united the lover with his beloved Transforming the Lover in her Beloved."
When entering the Dark Night one is overcome by a sense of spiritual dryness and depression. The notion, in some quarters, that all such experiences should be avoided, for a peaceful existence, shows up the superficiality of so much of contemporary living. The Dark Night is a way of bringing the Soul to stillness, so that deep psychic transformation may take place. All distractions must be set aside, and it is no good attempting to fight or channel the bursts of raw energy that from time to time may course through your being. This inner compulsion to set everything aside results in the outer depression, when nothing seems to excite.
The only thing to do is obey your inner voice and become still, waiting for the inner transformation, (which the "Dark Night" heralds), to take place. You may not be aware for a very long time of the results of that inner change, but when the desire to work comes again and the depression lifts, the Dark Night has (for a moment) passed. No one can help during this time, and in many cases there is hardly anyone to turn for advice. One must disregard the well-meaning advice of family and friends to "snap out of it" this is no ordinary depression, but a deep spiritual experience which only those who have passed through themselves (in other words to a magical retreat) but for many, as the routines of everyday life prohibits this, all you can do is cultivate an inner solitude, a stillness and silence of heart, and wait, (like a chrysalis waits for the inner changes that will result in a butterfly) for the Transformation to work itself out. There are many such "Dark Nights" that the occult seeker must pass through during the mysterious process of mitigation. They are all trials but experience teaches one to cope more efficiently.
2006-07-03
No pills today........
…….sonds like a song from long ago.
My sewing machine broke down, without me breaking down. A great thing. Have not taking pills today. Was thinking about calling my sister about the sewing machine, but decided not to. I can´t afford taking the risk of her nagging at me. I have to be egoistic. I have to avoid everything that can affect me in a negative way. I am still far from stable.
I spend the days at the lake. Letting the wind and sun caress me. Swimming if the waves are not too high. And paddling when possible. Just trying to heal myself. My skin is tanned, I look more healthy than I feel. ;-)
My sewing machine broke down, without me breaking down. A great thing. Have not taking pills today. Was thinking about calling my sister about the sewing machine, but decided not to. I can´t afford taking the risk of her nagging at me. I have to be egoistic. I have to avoid everything that can affect me in a negative way. I am still far from stable.
I spend the days at the lake. Letting the wind and sun caress me. Swimming if the waves are not too high. And paddling when possible. Just trying to heal myself. My skin is tanned, I look more healthy than I feel. ;-)
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