No reading but theory

Have not read anything in that book for a couple of days. My head is full of it anyway.

I´ve been thinking about awakened people. They are strange! Like this last one I read about. Once he was awakened he started, as it seems on his website anyway, to read and study a lot of religion and old sacred texts. Most of them seem to do that. Wonder why? I mean, once you are there, what fun is it to read about it then? That "leftover" part of mind really wants to know what happened, and it keeps them back. I think!

It seems to me that they are not really done. Not the way I think it should be anyway. I might be wrong but that is how I feel about it.

It seems like they all have a bit of identity/ego left in them, connecting them to the bodies. It is human with a Rigpa experience, not Rigpa with human experience.

It is said that the experience has to be strengthened in its abiding in Rigpa. It seems to be able to go back and forth. Slowly making Rigpa stronger then “ego”. It seems like even a backpain can draw one back from Rigpa. I think that is strange. Rigpa should be aware of the pain in the body but should not be affected by it. Certainly not be pulled away because of the body ache.

It seems like this awakening process is a process of a prolonged birth. Several “pushes” to bring the Rigpa forth. Then a period of adjusting the “sight and awareness” from blur to clear sight and knowing. Going back and forth until the pendulum stops and all is known.

So, to go to where my instinct tell me, it seem to be a 20 more years journey at least. Then… what the point of it when this body is 82 and ready to die. Then, there has been a huge effort to get hold of a body to look throu, just to loose it again.

Doubt that the book will be of any help. I am not like the others. I have this picture but the instructions that gives in the writings is not helping me to get there. Just some verifications is found.